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Jax Lynn - possible new version

Started by MarcoSkoll, July 17, 2010, 05:19:26 AM

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MarcoSkoll

Okay, this is a bit speculative, although given the work put into it, it's likely to stick.

One of the characters in Inquisitor Skoll's warband is Jax Lynn, a mutant with such powerful regeneration as to be able to recover from even death, making him effectively immortal.
Unfortunately, he's one of those characters where I like the basic concept, but don't feel I've executed it quite right. He was added later on in the development of the warband, and was a bit rushed, never getting quite as much thought as the others. So, (possible) Ret-Con time!

~~~~~

One warning to begin with. The background below approaches 2900 words - which I think makes it the second longest background I've ever posted. (The longest, as far as I know, was Frost's 4200 word background on the last 'Clave.)

I do have a tl;dr version, but I only do that for the sake of knowing exactly how to summarize the character to a GM if necessary. It's not really enough to allow meaningful critique of either the background or the profile, so I'm not going to bother posting it.

~~~~~

The first big difference is because one of my gaming group insists on calling him "Jacqueline"... so, yes, (s)he's now another addition to the growing list of characters where I've changed their gender from my original concept.

Second big difference is that I decided I wanted her to have a tail.




NAME: Jacqueline Lynn

KNOWN ALIASES: "Jax", "Jackal". (Never known as "Jackie")

RANK / AFFILIATION: No official Imperial rank;  Part of Inquisitor Marco Skoll's entourage.

AGE / GENDER / APPEARANCE (deviantART link - EDIT: Updated): 45 Terran years; Female
Species: Human Mutant
Height:  5' 7" / Weight: 161 lbs
Eyes: Red / Hair: Blonde, almost white.
Ambidextrous as a side effect of her mutation.

Jacqueline is a mutant, but a stable one. Lucky enough to escape the afflictions of asymmetry, atrophy or other such traits normally associated with the mutant underclass, she is however still clearly not a normal human - her mottled skin and tail (about 66" long) are the most obvious, but her blood red eyes make their own contribution to her rather unique appearance.
However, the most striking abnormality only becomes apparent when she is injured. With a healing rate several orders of magnitude beyond the human norm, wounds heal in mere moments.

Her hair is usually abnormally long - while nowhere near her normal cellular generation rates, it grows considerably faster than that of a normal human, averaging several inches a month. However, as it is not subject to her regeneration (rather, just accelerated growth), she is occasionally seen with shorter hair if she has suffered particularly serious injury in recent months.
When at its more "normal" length, it is generally kept in several "pony-tails", held together by drilled-out bolter casings - although nobody is really sure where she got them from.

While she is technically marginally older than Inquisitor Skoll, her physical appearance is one of a woman barely out of adolescence. Due to her mutation, she has absolutely no scarring or lasting injuries, enhancing the illusion of her age.

ATTIRE: Generally wears relatively unassuming clothing, often vaguely military in style. While occasionally seen in smarter attire (usually if pretending to be a mutant slave of the Inquisitor), it remains reasonably simple and low-key.

Rather used to surviving incidents where she is more durable than her clothing, Jax doesn't usually get particularly fond of any particular items. She has also grown fairly indifferent to being naked, although she does still prefer to be dressed.

Often wears a hooded cloak over the top of whatever else she's wearing if going out in public.

PERSONALITY & BELIEFS: As one might expect of someone who the system has treated so harshly, Jacqueline can be bitter about the Imperium. Her part in Inquisitor Skoll's entourage is not driven by a perceived "dedication to duty" (as motivates some), but rather out of curiosity - as well as the fact that his authority provides her considerable freedom from restrictive mutant laws.

She has a fiery and energetic personality, bringing a tendency for a rather quick temper with it. This character flaw is somewhat exacerbated by the fact that her near immortality is matched by an audacious fearlessness - with no fear of injury, she has few reservations about resorting to violence.

The exception to her temper, oddly, is jibes about her mutation, having long since come to terms with the fact she is different - and there are few slurs she has not already heard. However, she does not hold that her mutation somehow makes her inferior.

This is linked to Jax having lost faith in the teachings of the Ecclesiarchy. While she avoids actually conflicting with Imperial religious doctrine, she has been irreligious for decades, merely making enough pretences to avoid earning the ire of the faithful.
She refuses to speak on the matter of what lies beyond death, although the mere shadow of this knowledge has considerably haunted many of the telepaths who have ventured into her mind.

Despite her "abilities", she retains considerable modesty, mostly to avoid alienating the few friends she has. As part of this, she never uses her regeneration for "mundane" tasks - she will only ever deliberately choose to take injury under rather extreme circumstances.

While she makes some efforts to conform to the affectations of a more civilised society, Jacqueline has never really got the hang of formal conversation - combined with her accent, her attempts at it usually sound very unnatural. A slightly weak grammatical grasp means her normal dialogue gives her the vague (and partially correct) air of being uneducated.

Jax's incredibly tough childhood has made her an exceptionally hard worker (not working hard enough was punishable by shock prod, or in extreme cases, death) prepared to give her all even when things might appear dire.

ABILITIES / STRENGTHS / WEAKNESSES: Straight up, Jacqueline's skill in combat is probably the least of the "fighters" in Inquisitor Skoll's employ - while borderline competent in both close quarters and at range, she has never really applied herself to further improving.

However, her body has some of the most powerful regenerative abilities known to the Imperium. Aside from being able to flawlessly heal horrific wounds in mere moments, she has recovered from being medically dead on several occasions since her birth. To date, no limits have been found to what injuries she can heal, although she herself is unsure she could survive decapitation, total incineration/disintegration or prolonged deprivation of needs - but based on the other things she has survived, these don't necessarily carry much certainty.

Like most other humans, she has no ability to control her healing ability (including an inability to slow or stop it), although she can assist and speed healing in some ways - such as removing foreign objects and straightening broken bones. It has been speculated that her ability to keep together mind and soul without a living body is psychic in nature, although no test has ever confirmed she has any psychic potential.

Other side effects of her mutation include a notably (although not hugely) greater physical strength than her build would suggest, nearly limitless stamina, and the development of a more intricate network of motor neurons - something which has given her naturally high physical agility and balance (assisted, to some extent, by her tail) and ambidexterity.

Although having quite such a resilient aide is valuable to an Inquisitor, it is not without its problems. Aside from being apparently immortal, evidence suggests she is heavily resistant to mind scrubbing. These two factors combined mean that it is even more vital to maintain "need-to-know" when she is involved, as she is not easily dealt with if her knowledge becomes a liability.
There has also been one occasion on which there was a massive effort to recover her body from other parties before her "talent" asserted itself.

One obvious weakness of Jax is that she is a mutant - with most Imperial worlds heavily restricting mutants, she is usually dependent on having an escort, if she can go out at all.
She is also relatively susceptible to physic attacks, which her regenerative ability offers little defence against (excepting the powers of biomancers). While reasonably strong of mind, she has fallen foul of telepaths in the past.

While Jacqueline is relatively intelligent, her less than privileged youth provided very little (if anything) in the way of education. She has taken to improving this situation over the past few years, although there are still sizeable gaps in her knowledge.

Given several years of training by Arden Holf, Jax is a pretty competent pilot. Although capable of piloting larger craft, her expertise is largely in smaller craft - usually atmospheric or shorter range space vehicles.

WEAPONS AND EQUIPMENT: Jacqueline's primary armament is a pair of matching stubbers, which she combines with a back mounted rig designed to allow her to reload with only a single hand.
Although twin pistols are a relatively inefficient combination of combat weapons, this suits her just fine, as her combat often focuses more around suppressing and distracting any opposition rather than necessarily eliminating them.

In the event that she does end up in hand to hand combat, she has never really mastered any close combat weapon, and prefers to engage in incredibly short ranged pistol fights.
Although she does carry a concealed knife, it is used as an escape tool - should she should become trapped or bound, her regeneration makes simply severing the limb in question a viable option.

She does not normally wear armour - while such protection would undoubtedly increase her already impressive survivability, she prefers the freedom of movement.

SERVANTS/ACQUAINTANCES: Jacqueline's closest friend is Arden Holf, with the two having held a firm companionship for decades (although both deny that there is any thought of a romantic relationship).
However, in recent years, certain issues have started to arise. The former smuggler is aging, and has long refused any form of rejuvenat. This has proven something of a dilemma for Jacqueline, with the conflict between respecting her friend's decision and the knowledge that their friendship can only last so much longer.

Having been with Arden for decades now (and having been his second in command for much of that time), she is also familiar with the entirety of the crew for both the Ynys Mon and its drop-ship, the Vesuvius.

Jacqueline is on good terms with Inquisitor Skoll, maintaining what is the only real friendship that the Inquisitor has with his staff. Although, Marco remains cautious about the immortal - no Inquisitor can completely trust anyone, and she would be considerably harder to deal with if she became a liability.

Having had four years to get to know each other, Silva Birgen and Jacqueline are usually on fairly good terms, although they do occasionally fall out with one another. Silva's general distrust of mutants (caused by the events of Thrupp V) is one of the most common points of contention between the two.

There is little bond between Jacqueline and Giovanna Ciris, as the Arbitrator's heavily ingrained views of "purity" mean that it's only really on the Inquisitor's orders that she works with the mutant at all. While Giovanna is somewhat distant around most people anyway, she has generally avoided contact with the mutant as far as possible, although there are some signs the two may be slowly becoming a bit less unfriendly to each other.

HISTORY: Jacqueline was born on Hyran IV, a world known for a genetically tolerable, but heavily downtrodden mutant population. She was born considerably premature, with her impressive cellular generation rates showing up even before her birth.

Relatively little is known about her parents (who were mutants themselves), as the records on Hyran only ever assign numbers to mutants, and children are usually separated from parents very young.
But given the harsh treatment of mutants on Hyran, a mutant was lucky to make it past 20 years of age (with offspring, if any, usually being had at ages most humans would consider highly underage), making it almost certain that both are long since dead.

Given the exceptionally high mutant death rates, Jacqueline's own survival is probably only due to her near immortality. She, like her peers, was treated as expendable enough for tasks as suicidal as cleaning rad chambers, fixing unguarded and running machinery, as well as the heavily feared task of starting the Ellis tubes. It was not unknown for mutants to simply go missing in the night - with widely circulated rumours of experimentation.

Understandably, there were regular attempts to break free of the mutant hovels. On a good day, the guards would chase and recapture escapees, returning them to the hovels after a considerable beating. On a bad day, they would simply shoot the fleeing mutants.
It was on her fourth escape attempt that they decided to just gun down the escaping pack of mutants. She was shot twelve times before her wounds finally overcame her regeneration, collapsing to the floor dead.

Much to her own surprise, she woke up two hours later. Stripped entirely naked, and half buried under a pile of her dead fellows, she quickly came to the realisation of what had happened. After her death, she had been loaded aboard one of the many trucks that took mutant bodies for incineration. As most of these trucks were loaded by other mutants, it was frequently the case that they would "recycle" the clothing of the dead.

Her body still a mess of healing tissue, she forced her way out from under of the heap of bodies. It was her misfortune that while the facility was largely crewed by other mutants, her escape was instead noticed  by one of the armed guards. Confronting her, the fight was incredibly short. She was completely naked and yet to fully recover, facing off against an armed, armoured and trained guard - but he was only human.

Without hesitation, she fled, using a laspistol stolen from the guard to blow through a drain grate and escape via the hive's sewer system. Evading her pursuers by part luck and part natural agility, she eventually managed to make it into the "civvy zones".
Having never been outside of the mutant zones before, she had no idea of what to expect, and was cruelly introduced to the fact she could expect exactly the same when she was set upon by a group of drunken youths.

However, it happened that not everyone in that area of the hive that day was local. In the interests of fencing the cargo from another one of his smuggling runs, Arden Holf, better known to his clients as "Icebreaker", had been moving between various gang leaders. Drawn by the noise of the fighting, he arrived to find Jax lying in a pool of blood, with several others disappearing into the distance.
Initially unconcerned, he began to write it off as simply another murdered mutant when he realised that she wasn't actually dead and the knife wounds were closing up before his eyes.

With his interest aroused, he pulled the buck naked and excrement encrusted mutant girl to her feet, wrapping her in his long duster coat. Carrying her back to his drop ship, the Vesuvius, he waited for her to regain full coherence, before showing her the first hospitality she had ever received from a normal human. After allowing her to wash, clothe and eat, he eventually convinced her to relate the story of how she had got into the alleyway.

After listening to her story, he made her an offer. She could leave immediately if she wished - alternatively, if she was up for it, he had uses for someone with her abilities. Knowing full well that leaving left her on the streets of Hyran to fend for herself, she took him up on his proposition.
Over the following years, she slowly adopted the role of being another of Arden's bodyguards (although thugs might be a more appropriate term for some of them), and always managed to survive, regardless of the situation.
With time proving her reliability and forming a strong bond between the pair, it was little surprise that Arden eventually chose her to act as his second, training her over several years in the art of piloting.

When Arden was eventually recruited by Inquisitor Skoll, she followed. Introduced to the work of the Inquisition by first-hand experience of the infamous Rugis operation, she was eventually one of only nine individuals who escaped the Caverns of Genesis, and would later save Marco's life during the Gercshcliff breakout.

She has continued to follow the Inquisitor in more recent years, playing parts in such events as the Tannhauser Gate investigation, and most recently, the Tigguo Cobauc election, where she assisted in several "secondary" tasks for the Inquisitor.

Unfortunately, despite Marco's efforts, rumours of her resurrective ability have started to spread through the Carthaxian Conclave, and have caught the ear of more than one Thorian - if the secret to her resurrections could be found, then surely it would be capable of restoring the Emperor?

QUIRKS/NOTES:
-   Jacqueline's name was originally just Jax (her parents weren't that inventive) - it was only after people repeatedly misheard her name that she took on the name of "Jacqueline".
-   Being manhandled, particularly if by her tail, is practically guaranteed to get her angry.
-   Her metabolism means she is almost incapable of becoming intoxicated. As a result, she usually doesn't bother trying.
-   One of the few occasions she has worn armour was during the Tannhauser Gate operation. Subsequent examination of the modified Storm Trooper armour she used revealed she survived least 237 hits.
-   Due to years of experience altering clothing to account for her tail, Jacqueline has become rather good at sewing.

QUOTES:
Shortly after Inquisitor Skoll has started a mission briefing: "This better not be another one of those plans where I'm doing the dangerous part."

On the matter of clothing:
Jacqueline Lynn: "... and nowhere sells trousers with a tail hole."
Silva Birgen: "I know what you mean. Everywhere does them with legs of the same length."
Jacqueline Lynn: "I'd call you weird, but coming from me..."

Arden 'Icebreaker' Holf on Jacqueline's position amongst his crew: "I've seen that woman walk from hitting the ground at two hundred kilometres an hour. It sure doesn't hurt if your co-pilot can do that."

When asked about why she's playing card tricks:  "I'm young and life is long - and there's time to kill today."

In response to Inquisitor Skoll's questions about her loyalty: "No, I don't have dedication to duty. I also don't fear you, I don't particularly like the Imperium and I'm not interested in piles of wealth. But you respect me, and this work isn't a bad start to eternity. But all that aside, I'm not leaving Arden."

Occasionally: "Oh... this is going to hurt."

Regularly: "I'll have to live with that."




WS   BS   S    T    I    Wp   Sg   Nv    Ld
56   52   60   65   60   54   42   120   53

Jacqueline is Ambidextrous

Skills: Covering Fire, Gunfighter.
Traits: Hard Head, Pain is nothing, True Grit.
Mutations: Indestructible, Tailed.
Minor Skills: Stable Mind, Unbreakable, What lies beyond.

Weapons: 2x Standard Stubber, 8x Stubber reloads, Knife.
Armour:  None
Equipment: Comm-Link, Reloading Rig.

Hard Head: If stunned as a result of injury, the effect will only last for the next turn, and is not cumulative with stunning from any other source. Stunning as a result of psychic powers, toxins, shock weapons, etc, is not affected.

Pain is Nothing: For the purposes of System Shock and Consciousness, the character's toughness is increased by half. The character ignores the first point of speed lost due to injury.

Indestructible: Jacqueline has the Regeneration ability, but may attempt to regenerate even if she is stunned, suffering from system shock, or unconscious. Alternatively, she may choose to exchange her regeneration action for either of:
- A re-roll on any one T test (e.g. poison resistance) she is entitled to take in the recovery phase (although she must "declare" the re-roll before the normal test, "spending it" regardless of whether or not the initial roll passes)
- Elect to take a T test, and if passed, recover half her margin of success from any reduced stat (up to its starting value).

If for any reason, she suffers a "Dead" result (Crippled result to head, Injury total exceeding her toughness, or whatever other reason), her injuries have proven temporarily fatal. She will play no further part in this scenario, although her regeneration can, and has, brought her bring her back from death, it takes some time. However, for most campaign purposes, unless the next game immediately follows or her injuries were very serious, she will have recovered entirely.

Stable Mind: Campaign Skill. Immune to amnesia, memory modification, mind-scrubbing, brainwashing and other such effects (even if she might like to forget some things). While they may  last temporarily (i.e. No effect on tabletop play), it doesn't take too long for "normality" to reassert itself.

Unbreakable: While Jax is not completely immune to torture, GMs should bear in mind that a near immortal who hardly feels pain and has already had to deal with such things as humiliation and betrayal (she's a mutant in the Imperium!) is a tougher nut than most and should apply bonuses/penalties as appropriate.
(However, at the same time, the fact she can't be killed means that her torturers don't exactly have to hold back.)

What lies beyond: Any attempt to use the Mind Scan power on Jax is a Hazardous Action. If failed, the psyker loses 2D10 Nerve and D10 willpower for the remainder of the game.
However, successful uses of Mind Scan and Psi-track on Jax will give away her "immortality".

Reloading Rig: An apparatus designed to hold several magazines, and allow Jax to reload her pistols using only a single hand. While using this, Jax may reload with a single hand - and may thus reload both her pistols simultaneously.

Tail: Essentially treated as a third arm (off-handed) which can be used for relatively basic tasks - holding a weapon, reloading, operating a door handle while both hands are full, et cetera. It is not particularly dextrous and cannot shoot firearms (although it may hold them), but it may be used for close combat attacks.

If not holding anything in her tail, Jax can use it to improve her balance. She may ignore the first 1 on her action dice for the purposes of calculating risky actions that relate to movement, may re-roll failures on any tests relating to balance, and increases her knockback value by half.

Jax's hit location chart is a bit different to normal.
Location   D120-20 Roll
Head        95-100
Chest       81-95
Abdomen     66-80
Arms        36-65
Groin       31-35
Legs        01-30
Tail       -19-00

(The table is arranged as such in order to avoid changing any current hit locations)

The tail injury table as per Arm injury table, but with the additional Persistent Serious effect that she may only use her balance ability on a D6 roll of 4+.




Anyway...

She does have quite a few rules, but her previous incarnation proves they're not actually all that hard to juggle.

She might also appear fairly powerful at first glance... but she isn't really. While she can ultimately survive almost anything, she has no armour, so she takes every hit. (Which is the reason why she has the "Hard Head" skill - the last version had a habit of getting stunned too easily.)

And while she's tough, most of the rest of her stats are pretty modest* (and her equipment is pretty basic). WS 56 and only a reach 1 knife (which she usually doesn't use) means she fairs badly in most close combats - and while she can use two pistols simultaneously, BS 52 and Range Band A means she's not all that great at shooting either.
*Except for Nv 120, but she is pretty much immortal, so she's not easily fazed.

She's also a potential liability in "Capture" scenarios, as her resurrection mean the opposition don't need to worry about pulling punches, beyond making sure there's a big enough piece of her to actually drag away.

Before anyone asks why I wrote the reloading rig, and didn't just use Quickload, it's because it means that if she runs empty, there's no option to just load one pistol for one action - she has to spend two actions, even if loading only one pistol. (Also, she would prefer to be able to reload single-handed if one of her arms is injured).

That hit location table is a theory I'm working on. Rather than interfering with the normal numbers, I think it might be easier to just do it that way. I'm prepared to use unusual dice when necessary.

As far as the art... couple of mistakes (I know the face is too small for the skull. Bad habit of mine) but I'm still rather proud of it, as it's the first piece I've done solely digitally (all previous line work has been drawn on paper, then scanned in). I plan to paint over it at some point, but I'm a bit too lazy at the moment.

I'm sure there's more I wanted to say (and there's the possibility that I've made a mistake in that background/profile), but I really shouldn't still be up at this time.
S.Sgt Silva Birgen: "Good evening, we're here from the Adeptus Defenestratus."
Captain L. Rollin: "Nonsense. Never heard of it."
Birgen: "Pick a window. I'll demonstrate".

GW's =I= articles

Shannow

Really like the concept and it reminds me very much of the lizard from spiderman, who in my opinion is one of the better characters to come from that series.

My only quibble is that you mention her resistance to mind scrubbing but that she is susceptible to psychic attacks. On the face of it to me, this seems contradictory. I assume that the processes are distinct enough to make this plausible though?

Her history is also very nicely succinct yet choc full detail such as Arden Holfs nickname 'Icebreaker', lovely detail and sterling stuff.

Can't wait to see her modelled and I think given her stats and equipment she is very nicely balanced and not overpowered especially compared to other acceptable characters anyway (myself having some).

Rob
I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tanhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.

Time to die.

MarcoSkoll

Quote from: Shannow on July 17, 2010, 08:01:45 PMReally like the concept and it reminds me very much of the lizard from spiderman, who in my opinion is one of the better characters to come from that series.
I did contemplate making her more lizard like, but I thought the "regenerating anthropomorphic lizard" was a bit too common as a concept, so I decided to steer clear.

QuoteMy only quibble is that you mention her resistance to mind scrubbing but that she is susceptible to psychic attacks. On the face of it to me, this seems contradictory.
It's pretty much the same thing as her physical regeneration - while she can be physically injured, she ultimately recovers.
Similarly, while telepathic effects can work temporarily (and work pretty well, she's got one of the lower Wp values of my collection) they don't last for very long. Longer than most of her injuries, but if mind-scrubbed, the affected memory repairs itself in a matter of hours (sometimes days). No-one quite knows why this is, but when you've got someone who can come back from being dead, the fact their memory and personality heal themselves as well is less of a surprise.

To discuss it on a meta level, it's a fairly deliberate flaw. After all, it's not much to say "We'll have to be careful what she knows, it'll be hard to kill her if she becomes a liability" if she can simply be mind-scrubbed instead.
She's deliberately done in a way that means she has problems, as opposed to just being someone just giving the regeneration ability because it means their character heals automatically.

QuoteHer history is also very nicely succinct yet choc full detail such as Arden Holfs nickname 'Icebreaker', lovely detail and sterling stuff.
What I do realise is missing from that background is the age at which she escaped - I think I'll go with seventeen. I want her to be quite young, but not too young.

I do plan to post Arden Holf's background at some point. Everyone loves characters with shady criminal pasts!
S.Sgt Silva Birgen: "Good evening, we're here from the Adeptus Defenestratus."
Captain L. Rollin: "Nonsense. Never heard of it."
Birgen: "Pick a window. I'll demonstrate".

GW's =I= articles

Shannow

Very well explained and makes perfect sense, definitely adds an interesting element of play if you can gain control of an un-killable character :P

Quote from: MarcoSkoll on July 17, 2010, 10:38:18 PM
. Everyone loves characters with shady criminal pasts!
Hell yes we do!!


I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tanhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.

Time to die.

MarcoSkoll

#4
Quote from: Shannow on July 17, 2010, 10:54:48 PMVery well explained and makes perfect sense, definitely adds an interesting element of play if you can gain control of an un-killable character
Yes and no. In some ways, she's a less appealing target for Puppet Master.

After all, if a normal character gets "controlled", roleplay normally means that their allies try to avoid doing them serious injury. However, to Jax, almost no injury is serious - while from a gameplay perspective I don't want her sporting eight extra injury levels when I regain control of her, from a roleplay perspective there's no real problem with it.

So, possibly a more vulnerable target when "Puppet Mastered", but not that any opposing player would necessarily complain that I'm doing half the work of killing her for him.
S.Sgt Silva Birgen: "Good evening, we're here from the Adeptus Defenestratus."
Captain L. Rollin: "Nonsense. Never heard of it."
Birgen: "Pick a window. I'll demonstrate".

GW's =I= articles

Brother_Brimstone

With such a lengthy and well-written background, i feel it would be a waste if i read it and didn't comment! Anyway, as a result of that, I hope you don't mind that I don't have much to add...

I think she's a well balanced character - the immortality has an effect on gameplay, but it doesn't break it. She can still be taken out of play, stunned and injured, it's just harder to do and it balances well due to the fact that she's exposed to psychic attacks and has only limited offensive potential.

While there are quite a lot of rules, I would say that if you're okay with remembering all of them, then it's fine - some things need a fair few rules to adequately represent.

Anyway, great fluff for a great character idea, i think you've made her really three dimensional (the touch about her being good at sewing for example, really impressed me - it's the little touches that really make the character) and the stats represent her well. Good stuff.

Myriad

You have an injury table for use with an actual D120!  Nice character too, it'd be easy for her imperviousness to injury to define her, but you've managed to avoid that.  I agree that being able to regeneratemost injuries isn't too powerful in game
I had better point out, that some of the clubs I represent are of a military bent.

You know what you are?  A plywood shark!

MarcoSkoll

Anyway, meant to reply earlier. Got sidetracked with some tinkering I'm doing on an old air cannon.

Quote from: Brother_Brimstone on July 20, 2010, 03:22:35 AMWith such a lengthy and well-written background, i feel it would be a waste if i read it and didn't comment! Anyway, as a result of that, I hope you don't mind that I don't have much to add...
No problem. I'd rather hear feedback that says "I haven't much to say" than just complete silence. One tells me that people like (or at least, don't have any real problems with) what I've done. The other tells me nothing.

QuoteShe can still be taken out of play, stunned and injured, it's just harder to do
Well, as you know from Zophar's poor luck at the Spring Conclave, True Grit and Regenerate don't necessarily guarantee a character surviving!

It's obviously not a direct parallel, as she's got a rather higher toughness, but doesn't have Zophar's Impervious - still, the same basic principles of not being invincible apply. Send a few bullets her way, and she'll still feel it (in fact, more so than many characters, given the total absence of armour). It just won't keep her down as long as it might another character.

QuoteWhile there are quite a lot of rules, I would say that if you're okay with remembering all of them, then it's fine - some things need a fair few rules to adequately represent.
The only real problems I have with remembering rules is if I make a change to them. For example, Silva was given the Leader ability prior to the Spring Conclave - which I forgot on the day. This was partly because she'd never had it previously, and partly because I have a habit of turning up to gaming events suffering from extreme insomnia. (It wasn't so bad that particular day, but at the 2009 IGT, I was 50 hours awake at the start.)
I wouldn't have made much difference anyway (as she wasn't close enough to any of my other characters when they failed Nv tests), but I'll remember for next time...

I'm not really a stranger to using a multiple special rules per character - if given a minute to think about it, I could recall most of my character sheets from memory.
After a couple of games, I usually find it's pretty easy to keep track of even rather complex characters.

QuoteAnyway, great fluff for a great character idea
I'll admit that it's not necessarily the most original thing out there (given that "regeneration" was one of the exotic abilities in the rulebook, it's possibly the most common mutation given to characters), but I'd like to think I've done enough to make it interestingly different - if only by exploring consequences and side effects that may exist.

QuoteI think you've made her really three dimensional (the touch about her being good at sewing for example, really impressed me - it's the little touches that really make the character)
That's actually usually how I tell that I'm satisfied with a character. If they suddenly "click" and begin to feel real, rather than just a vague concept, that's generally "it".

Which is also usually why my backgrounds are so quite as long. After all, if I'm getting feedback, I might as well get feedback on the actual character rather than a summary condensed so it doesn't really feel like them any more.

Quote from: Myriad on July 20, 2010, 12:51:43 PMYou have an injury table for use with an actual D120!
Yeah, as it says, it's a deliberate ploy to avoid having to learn an entirely new hit location table. It's easy enough to remember. If it comes down negative, then it's her tail, anything else, it's as normal.
Although I will ultimately need to repaint a D12 to simplify things (sides 0-9, as well as -0 and -1). I will also need to remember to bring it to games...

Anyway, a character to add to the rather limited pantheon of tailed Inquisitor characters. There was a "Barbed tail" trait in the Alien Generator article, but I don't think it got used very often. I'd also have said it was a rather dull simplification. I quite liked writing in the rather simple idea that a tail can be used for such mundane things as balance (as it is in most creatures).

QuoteNice character too, it'd be easy for her imperviousness to injury to define her, but you've managed to avoid that.
That's a good thing to hear, mainly because it was something I was trying to avoid. After all, if you take a regenerating character and allow it to define them, then what you get is a walking cliché.

There are a load of things I see regenerators in film/TV doing which I don't really like - including the common one of injuring themselves because they're too lazy to do it the way a regular person might.
Now, Jax may not be very well educated, but she's smart enough to work out that doing such inhuman things isn't going to help other people think of you as human (and when you've got a tail, you don't really want to make things harder for yourself.)
S.Sgt Silva Birgen: "Good evening, we're here from the Adeptus Defenestratus."
Captain L. Rollin: "Nonsense. Never heard of it."
Birgen: "Pick a window. I'll demonstrate".

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Myriad

#8
Quote from: MarcoSkoll on July 21, 2010, 04:35:16 AM

I'm not really a stranger to using a multiple special rules per character - if given a minute to think about it, I could recall most of my character sheets from memory.
After a couple of games, I usually find it's pretty easy to keep track of even rather complex characters.

The only time I had particular trouble remembering a rule was actually when my inquisitor had an implanted powerfist in his off-hand, which is hardly complex.  I normally apply a mental test of 'can I explain this in 30 seconds'.

Quote from: MarcoSkoll on July 21, 2010, 04:35:16 AM
Quote from: Myriad on July 20, 2010, 12:51:43 PMYou have an injury table for use with an actual D120!
Yeah, as it says, it's a deliberate ploy to avoid having to learn an entirely new hit location table. It's easy enough to remember. If it comes down negative, then it's her tail, anything else, it's as normal.
Although I will ultimately need to repaint a D12 to simplify things (sides 0-9, as well as -0 and -1). I will also need to remember to bring it to games...

nonono, theres a polyhedron for this.  I just need to find one...

Quote from: MarcoSkoll on July 21, 2010, 04:35:16 AM
Anyway, a character to add to the rather limited pantheon of tailed Inquisitor characters. There was a "Barbed tail" trait in the Alien Generator article, but I don't think it got used very often. I'd also have said it was a rather dull simplification. I quite liked writing in the rather simple idea that a tail can be used for such mundane things as balance (as it is in most creatures).

Tails are rather underused, being an easy way to add to the 'mutant' aspect of a character.  Maybe my rogue techpriest will have one.  I guess there aren't too many easy sources for tails, but that shouldn't be a big issue.

Quote from: MarcoSkoll on July 21, 2010, 04:35:16 AM
QuoteNice character too, it'd be easy for her imperviousness to injury to define her, but you've managed to avoid that.
That's a good thing to hear, mainly because it was something I was trying to avoid. After all, if you take a regenerating character and allow it to define them, then what you get is a walking cliché.

There are a load of things I see regenerators in film/TV doing which I don't really like - including the common one of injuring themselves because they're too lazy to do it the way a regular person might.
Now, Jax may not be very well educated, but she's smart enough to work out that doing such inhuman things isn't going to help other people think of you as human (and when you've got a tail, you don't really want to make things harder for yourself.)

"I've got this.  Invulnerable, remember?"  Yeah, that wears thin pretty quickly.
I had better point out, that some of the clubs I represent are of a military bent.

You know what you are?  A plywood shark!

MarcoSkoll

Quote from: Myriad on July 22, 2010, 12:05:36 PMnonono, theres a polyhedron for this.  I just need to find one...
Nah, I think an actual hecatonicosahedron might be a little silly. I'll do it the same way as is typical for a D100.

QuoteTails are rather underused, being an easy way to add to the 'mutant' aspect of a character.
Well, yes, that was one of the basic points. I'd decided as I did the previous version that I didn't want to make him a mutant who looked like he'd started melting.
But, later on, I realised merely having mottled skin and off-colour eyes meant that it was unclear of whether he was actually a mutant or just an unfortunate suffering from skin pigment disorders and rare eye colouration.

Obviously, not every mutant has to look like they've half melted, but I decided I wanted to remove the ambiguity. So, on the redevelopment of the character, I looked at some options, with the tail eventually winning out. Most of the other possibilities were discarded either on the basis that they were "too Chaotic" or "looks like a bad Dr Who alien".

Quote"I've got this.  Invulnerable, remember?"  Yeah, that wears thin pretty quickly.
Well, there are occasions where she will put her invulnerability to use. However, my general rule of thumb is "If someone else who couldn't regenerate did this, would it be deemed brave or idiotic?"
Obviously there's often overlap between the two, but if idiotic is the closer answer, then it's probably not appropriate for her to do it.

For examples of extremely idiotic, Heroes provides such uses of regeneration as "unblocking a garbage disposal with your fingers", "getting stuff out of the oven without using gloves" and "holding your hand in a bunsen flame".
S.Sgt Silva Birgen: "Good evening, we're here from the Adeptus Defenestratus."
Captain L. Rollin: "Nonsense. Never heard of it."
Birgen: "Pick a window. I'll demonstrate".

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Jamas Orian

I'm going to keep this simple:

A positively brilliant character profile.

That is all :D

MarcoSkoll

Well, it seems the feedback has only really been positive, so combined with my satisfaction with her, it looks like this can't really pretend to be a "possible" version any longer.

I'm actually somewhat surprised by the overall feedback to be honest. While I'd tried to put a lot of effort into the background and justifying/balancing the profile, I was still expecting that I would have to defend more of my design choices.
But if the combination of blind luck, winging it and keyboard mashing which I call character creation has somehow created someone who has managed to breeze through a Conclave critique... I'm not complaining.

Anyway - bed time, I think.
S.Sgt Silva Birgen: "Good evening, we're here from the Adeptus Defenestratus."
Captain L. Rollin: "Nonsense. Never heard of it."
Birgen: "Pick a window. I'll demonstrate".

GW's =I= articles

Jamas Orian

Visiting this again for inspiration - I have noticed something. Personally I'd call her relatively competent at combat, rather than 'borderline competent', as that would suggest to me that she would be more in the high 40s to mid 59s rather than firmly in the 60s. If she is supposed to be in the 60s for BS and WS, I'd suggest a slightly more complementary adjective =]

MarcoSkoll

She isn't in the 60s for either WS or BS...  ???
Unless of course they've updated maths since I did my A-level and there's some kind of newfangled kind where 56 and 52 are in the 60s?
S.Sgt Silva Birgen: "Good evening, we're here from the Adeptus Defenestratus."
Captain L. Rollin: "Nonsense. Never heard of it."
Birgen: "Pick a window. I'll demonstrate".

GW's =I= articles

Flinty

I've been pondering on Ms. Lynn for a while, and as Brother Brimstone says, to not comment seems rude after all the effort you have put into her.

Initially I was wondering if immortal/indestructible characters were game skewing in any way; is there really a scenario that would challenge such an individual? Having read your background and the subsiquent discussion, I can see that your view of the character (and presumably, your intended playing style) will impose some interesting limits.

Her stats and abilities are fitting (obviously evolving from her well thought out and developed backstory) without ''unnecessary'' or unexplained tweaks or additions. Excellent stuff.

I don't think I've seen (or quite possibly entirely forgotten) the skill description for 'Covering Fire' - how does it work?
 
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