With Hans Grummond's warband completed and painted, I decided I needed another one to act as potential adversary. Starting with the Inquisitor. When I'm done here I will post her model in the Painting and Modelling section.
Inquisitor Rayne Serephene
Rayne Serephene was trained from an early age as a seductress on the pleasure planet of Khysis. The seductresses of Khysis were a dedicated order of courtesan-spies, who used their considerable talents to extract information from unwilling and unwitting victims. It was a role in which Serephene excelled, not least because of her considerable telepathic talents, a psychic gift she kept carefully concealed. Her comfortable life came to an abrupt end when her abilities were uncovered by the noted Witchfinder Inquisitor Schorner.
Puritanical by philosophy, but radical by means, Inquisitor Schorner trained Acolytes to Infilitrate Chaos cults and heretical organisations as double agents and used the intelligence gathered to bring them down. Serephene's skills and talents were perfect for his needs. Schorner gave her a simple choice, join him or be burned at the stake.
After some months of training, Serephene was put to work infiltrating the Cult of the Crested Serpent, a corrupt organisation of dissolute Imperial Nobles in the Maglos sector. She proved highl adept, gathering considerable information without being uncovered. She followed this with further successes breaking the Gaping Maw cult, the Raglon Heresy and the Skitergaze clan. Serephene proved to be a highly gifted actor, able to completely immerse herself in her role and blend into all manner of society from sumptuous nobility to outlaw gangs. In fact, she was so successful that several of her alternate personae are still wanted by Imperial authorities.
But her mentor never revealed to her was just how dangerous her new role was. The life expectancy of his acolytes was measure in months at best. Even if they did manage to remain undetected, Schorner would eventually declare them corrupted by their experiences and execute them. Serephene was by far his longest serving Acolyte, but even her days would have been numbered if not for the sudden death of Inquisitor Schorner on Daedalus V. Serephene took up his Inquisitorial seal and completed the mission.
Inquisitorial seals inherited in the line of duty have always been somewhat contentious and their were calls to strip the very young, by Inquisition standards, Serephene of the seal. But the venerable Inquisitor Lord Goroke spoke up in her favour, pointing to her considerable success rate. That Schorner would eventually have disposed of her remained unknown, or at least unspoken.
Despite her elevation to Inquisitor, Serephene continued much as she had before, infiltrating heretical organisations in order to destroy them from within. And her success rate was considerable. However, she was not without her detractors. After Exterminatus was called on planet Corcharon following the opening of warp gates in two of its major cities, Serephene's failure to act sooner was called into question. More sympathetic Inquisitors argued that even the most successful Inquisitor has some failures. Darker voices said that fall of Corcharon had been no accident, that Serephene had become the very thing she had pretended to be. Others whispered that she had engineered the death of Inquisitor Schorner and even that she knew secrets about Inquisitor Lord Goroke that forced him to support her.
In fact, Serephene is a radical Isstvanian, who long ago abandoned any loyalty to the Imperium, let alone the Inquisition, and sees her duty as to humanity itself. Serephene believes that the Imperium in its current state is hopelessly corrupt and stagnant. The only chance for humanity in a hostile universe is to reconstitute it entirely through strife or to replace it with an entirely new order. With that in mind, she seeks out radical and revolutionary organisations and builds them up to be a true threat to the established order. She then passes on their information to the Inquisition. Her reasoning being that the organisation most able to use her skills is the most fit to survive. She has no particular commitment to any ideology, Imperial, Radical, even Chaotic, it doesn't matter, the strongest should govern humanity.
Strangely, in spite of her indifference to cause and organisations, Serephene is very close to her Acolytes. Each of them is carefully selected and chosen to be true allies in her cause. She is not naive, and would sacrifice any of them if necessary, but only if necessary. She does not dispose of Acolytes out of hand like Schorner. The one secret she has always kept is her telepathic powers, reasoning that it would be impossible for her Acolytes to trust her if they knew she could hear their thoughts.
Striking and charismatic, Serephene is not a physical fighter, but uses her telepathic powers as a weapon. She is able to adapt herself perfectly to the people around her manipulating them to suit her own goals. And when that fails, planting images of horror in their minds can be just as effective, while her acolytes handle the heavy work.
WS BS S T I Wp Sg Nv Ld
55 43 48 52 73 84 80 60 81
Right Handed
Equipment: Force Staff, Sword, Laspistol
Armour: Flak (4) on Chest, Abdomen and Groin, Robes (2) everywhere else except head.
Psychic Powers: Demoralise, Distraction, Embolden, Enforce Will, Mind Scan, Terrify
Talents: Leader
I wanted her to be a thinker and a Psyker rather than a fighter, so I kept most of her combat characteristics relatively low, but her Leadership, Willpower and Sagacity high. I tried to give her a good mix of interesting, but not overly powerful telepathic powers. She doesn't have Telepathy because, although she can do it, she doesn't use because it would give her away.
Quote from: Hum_Con on May 21, 2012, 10:11:49 PM
She doesn't have Telepathy because, although she can do it, she doesn't use because it would give her away.
Then surely she should have Telepathy, even if she doesn't use it?
It's much of muchness really. I can write it down and say she doesn't use it, or just leave it off as it makes no practical difference to her rules. But I'm not sure it makes sense to include an ability she doesn't use. Look at it another way, in effect she can't use that ability, just of a different reason than normal. In this case, she can't use it, not because of lack of ability, but because it compromises her persona. In that sense, it is an ability not available to her.
Include it anyway. That way, if it does come down to a case in game where the situation is dire enough that she would use it (or indeed, if she were to be "compelled" by some manner), it's actually on her character sheet.
A character sheet should be what a character can do, not what they will do.
Quote from: Hum_Con on May 21, 2012, 11:00:09 PM
It's much of muchness really.
I disagree. If the fate of the Imperium rests on someone sending a telepathic message, would she really not send it because it compromises her? Inquisitors should have to make some hard choices now and then.
I would remove the part about not being a physical fighter and using her powers to fight, this would not work all that well if they are a carefully preserved secret. Her ws and bs show that she still is a reasonably good combatant, she could perhaps use weapons such as a poisoned dagger and other typical easy to hide weapons.
I also think she should go to the blackships.
And then you can have a plot point. Maybe she's still trying to destroy the final copies of the records that show she has telepathic skills? Maybe someone has a suspicion and wants to track her down and examine her brain. Maybe someone has the record and thinks she's lost a power, and wants to know why, and this be able to disable all psychers eventually?
Lots of fun.
Otherwise, great character. Should have Telepathy on the sheet though.
I still don't think telepathy belongs on the sheet, but I shall add a note.
Quote from: Dolnikan on May 22, 2012, 07:53:34 AM
I would remove the part about not being a physical fighter and using her powers to fight, this would not work all that well if they are a carefully preserved secret. Her ws and bs show that she still is a reasonably good combatant, she could perhaps use weapons such as a poisoned dagger and other typical easy to hide weapons.
I will probably clarify that, as I meant that she isn't a physical fighter by Inquisitorial standards. She has a laspistol and a force staff and can handle herself in a pinch.
But, as far as her Acolytes are concerned, she doesn't actually do much fighting. This is why I gave her quite subtle telepathic powers. If her Acolytes are feeling more confident they're hardly going to notice anything. Similarly, an opponent, dropping a weapon, tripping over the own feet or running away from a fight doesn't automatically suggest psychic powers at work.
But psychic powers don't always go completely to plan. There are often side-effects and bizarre phenomena, so you can't practically keep and use the secret at the same time.
Her acolytes would have to be wilfully ignorant to not even suspect it.
Quote from: MarcoSkoll on May 22, 2012, 08:03:14 PM
Her acolytes would have to be wilfully ignorant to not even suspect it.
Wilfully ignorant people? In the Imperium of man!?
Burn the heretic!!!
While there is certainly wilful ignorance in the Imperium, it certainly does not pertain to their paranoias. People will get lynched or burnt at the stake for the merest hint that they might be "tainted".
What with the skill set the Inquisition needs, wilful ignorance of suspicious signs or behaviours is unlikely to be a trait common amongst their agents.
Quote from: MarcoSkoll on May 22, 2012, 08:03:14 PM
But psychic powers don't always go completely to plan. There are often side-effects and bizarre phenomena, so you can't practically keep and use the secret at the same time.
Her acolytes would have to be wilfully ignorant to not even suspect it.
If you're throwing lightning bolts around sure, but the side effects of misused telepathy is more likely to be a nasty migrane. Plus, we are talking about individuals accustomed to being around strange phenomena, it doesn't follow that Serephene would be the source.
But perhaps a small qualifier is in order, maybe her acolytes know she's a psyker, she does have a force staff, but not that she's a telepath.
Character 2. Once again, I will post the picture in the painting and modelling section.
Tech Priest Martel Cranch
Martel Cranch was void born on a charter ship, where he was apprenticed to the ships attendant Tech-Priest, Parizianski. In space, where a technical failure can lead to loss of life or even the ship, rigidly following the rules of the Mechanicum is not always possible, and it was in this atmosphere that Martel spent his formative years.
Impressed by the intelligent, diligent boy, Tech Priest Parizianski sent him to study on the Forge World Fernium. Cranch studied hard, but eventually the call of space got to him and, on his ascension to the rank of Tech-Priest left the world and took up a life of wandering. Cranch became an Archaeologist, with some degree of success, uncovering a number of STCs. In spite of his success, Cranch made a number of enemies in the Mechanicum. This was doubtless in part due to his success, but also because of his unorthodox methods and tendency to flaunt the rules. Cranch was investigated several times, but no charges were ever brought against him.
This was to change when he was approached by Inquisitor Rayne Serephene. Serephene had uncovered the truth, that several of Cranch's STC's were forgeries, based on technology he had developed himself. The STC forgeries had been used to gain sanction for his inventions. He had only gotten away with it because his deception had been unthinkable to the Mechanicum. That Serephene could read his thoughts, she kept to herself.
His secret revealed, Cranch was afraid for his life, but far from condemning him, Serephene congratulated him on his deception and his unorthodox thinking. She needed an associate with technical skill not bound by the strictures of the Mechanicum. Sceptical at first, Cranch came to respect Serephene's radical beliefs and her access to Inquisition resources. Working with her allowed him to indulge his creativity and gave him access to archaeological sites he would never have seen otherwise.
Fidgety and constantly on the move, Cranch comes across as nervous, an effect reinforced by a faulty vox-caster that stammers and which Cranch has never gotten around to fixing. In fact Cranch simply takes in information at very high speed, thanks to his bionically enhanced brain. In fact, Cranch is reckless, with a disregard for his own safety and a tendency to let curiosity get the better of him.
WS BS S T I Wp Sg Nv Ld
52 65 57 56 66 63 81 67 52
Right Handed
Equipment: Stubber with Shot selector, 20 standard shells, 10 Man-stopper and 10 Flechette, Implated Chainfist, Mecha-dendrites, Servo Arm*, Advanced Bionic Brain, Bionic Head including rebreather, bionic eyes incorporating an infra scope, advanced bionic heart and two advanced bionic legs.
Armour: Bionics and robes giving 5 to head, 3 to chest, and abdomen, 2 to arms and 4 to groin and legs
*Cranch's servo arm is too cumbersome to be used as a weapon, although it's tools can be used for excavation and opening sealed doors, boxes, crates, tombs etc. It also provided 2 additional points of armour to Cranch's chest and head if he is being attacked from the rear.
But why would she hide the telepathic abilities if all the abilities they know she has are closely related to it? The clever ones would naturally deduce that she would also be capable of sensing such things.
About the tech priest, finding even a single STC is a huge thing, and full sanctioning will take centuries at the least, even a hint of forgery would be enough to get into a lot of trouble. The Mechanicus are absordly paranoid about such heresies.
Ruleswise I would reduce his nerve somewhat, he seems to be a strong believer in self-preservation and when shot at will certainly go for cover.
I have slightly revised the background for Cranch. The key changes are in paragraphs 2-4.
Tech Priest Martel Cranch
Martel Cranch was void born on a charter ship, where he was apprenticed to the ships attendant Tech-Priest, Parizianski. In space, where a technical failure can lead to loss of life or even the ship, rigidly following the rules of the Mechanicum is not always possible, and it was in this atmosphere that Martel spent his formative years.
Impressed by the intelligent, diligent boy, Tech Priest Parizianski sent him to study on the Forge World Fernium. Cranch studied hard, but eventually the call of space got to him and, on his ascension to the rank of Tech-Priest left the world and took up a life of wandering. He became a researcher, which for a Tech-Priest means archaeologist. He dedicated his time to scouring old ruins for lost technology, rediscovering hidden Mechanicus secrets from abandoned and desolate forge worlds and searching for the ever elusive STCs. He had some degree of success, discovering several valuable pieces of archeotech and even an STC thought lost from the Mechanicus archive on the ruined world of Telorum
In spite, or perhaps because of his success, Cranch made a number of enemies within the Mechanicum. Although jealousy certainly played some part, he was also criticised for his unorthodox methods and flexible attitude to doctrine. He was investigated several times but never charged.
This was to change when he was approached by Inquisitor Rayne Serephene. She had uncovered the truth, that several of his discoveries had been modified by him or even faked outright. His aim had been to see his own ideas accepted into Mechnicum lore. He had only avoided detection because such a plan was unthinkable to most Tech Priests. That Serephene could read his thoughts, she kept to herself.
His secret revealed, Cranch was afraid for his life, but far from condemning him, Serephene congratulated him on his deception and his unorthodox thinking. She needed an associate with technical skill not bound by the strictures of the Mechanicum. Sceptical at first, Cranch came to respect Serephene's radical beliefs and her access to Inquisition resources. Working with her allowed him to indulge his creativity and gave him access to archaeological sites he would never have seen otherwise.
Cranch has a considerable respect for Serephene, whom he regards as an intellectual equal, even if their skills lie in different spheres. He has long suspected that she is a telepath, but has kept her secret, partly through politeness and partly in case he needs leverage in the future.
Fidgety and constantly on the move, Cranch comes across as nervous, an effect reinforced by a faulty vox-caster that stammers and which Cranch has never gotten around to fixing. In fact Cranch simply takes in information at very high speed, thanks to his bionically enhanced brain. In fact, Cranch is reckless, with a disregard for his own safety and a tendency to let curiosity get the better of him.
Quote from: Dolnikan on May 23, 2012, 07:52:06 AM
Ruleswise I would reduce his nerve somewhat, he seems to be a strong believer in self-preservation and when shot at will certainly go for cover.
His relatively high nerve is reflective of his recklessness. While certainly a believer in self-preservation, he takes unecessary risks in the pursuit of his goals and will often get carried away in tense situations.
Character 3, the model is in the Painting and Modelling section. The background on this character got away from me a bit, but it also reveals a bit more about Inquisitor Serephene, so I have kept it long.
Salazar Grund - Mutant Revolutionary
Musupel is a world on the Fringe of the Imperium. Poor and squalid, with a thick, noxious atmosphere, its economy is based on the mining and processing of various useful, but largely toxic gasses and compounds. The small ruling glass, including the planetary governor, made the homes in floating cities, suspended above the worst of the planets atmosphere with powerful anti-grav generators. The bulk of the population, who lived on the surface, were exposed to the worst of the chemical effects. Mutation was rife.
On many other worlds, such mutations would have been purged, but Musupel needed a workforce that could tolerate its extreme conditions, so the mutants had to be tolerated. The ruling classes found an elegant solution, a twisted reading of the Imperial cult. The mutants were taught that they had been the lowest of the low, criminals and monsters in past lives and that their current life was a form of penance. If they worked hard, through the Emperor's mercy they would be reborn in the paradise of the great sky cities above. These teachings proved effective at keeping most of the mutant population in line.
It was into this world that Salazar Grund was born. A mutant from birth, he worked in the surface of Musupel. But his charisma, strong work ethic and fierce religious zeal saw him recruited as lay-preacher, the highest rank a mutant could obtain. He was taken to the greatest of the sky cities to received instructions from the Imperial cult. He was then sent back to the surface to spread the word of the Emperor to the mutant communities below, fired up by all that he had witnessed in the world above.
However, although their religious beliefs served to keep the mutant population in line, it had an unintended side-effect. The ruling classes had also been taught that mutants were the worst kind of sinners and scum. Any and all problems, real of imagined, were blamed on mutants. Delays in production were the result of mutant sabotage, transport delays were mutant saboteurs, outbreaks of disease were mutant contamination. Ambitious politicians used mutants as scape-goats for all their problems. The backlash came in the form of frequent purges of the mutant population as mutants were hunted, tortured and killed on the most flimsy of pretexts.
After centuries of oppression, the mutant population could only be contained for so long. A resistant movement started to form. The charismatic and zealous Salazar Grund was at its head. He had seen the cities above the clouds, and he had come to believe that the population above had turned away from the Emperor's light and become corrupt. He preached his new creed with fiery determination and the mutants started to listen.
About this time Inquisitor Rayne Serephene came to Musupel. Believing that the Imperium's casual purging of its mutant population was a waste of resources, she was intrigued by Musupel, where they had been put to productive use. But she quickly came to realise that the system was inherently unstable and decided to support the nascent mutant revolution. She contacted Grund, posing as a revolutionary from a distant world (not far removed from the truth) she was able to supply them with weapons and information. The revolution began.
Outnumbered, hundreds to one, the ruling classes were forced back. The mutants occupied the tethers that linked the cities to the surface and, when the elevator cables were cut, either built their own or simply started to climb. The cities were overrun, and the planetary defence forces forced to fight a failing rear guard action. At this point, the Governor, overtaken by events, desperately called for help. Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on your perspective, a Space Marine Battle barge of the Black Templars chapter, was nearby and redirected its course to Musupel.
Recognising that revolution was doomed, Serephene contacted the Space Marines and provided them with vital information on the revolution. However, she was loath to let the charismatic and intelligent revolutionary leader Grund be slaughtered by the Astartes. Recognising he would not abandon his colleagues, she waited for a meeting of the revolutionary leaders, sedated Grund and then blew up the building. When the Space Marines arrived, she was able to claim that Grund and the leaders had all been killed in the bombings that proceeded the initial attack. Most of the rest of the mutants were slaughtered by the Space Marines.
However, the putting down of the revolution did not save the Governor, or much of Musupel's leadership, who were summarily executed by the Templar commander for their heretical perversion of the Imperial Cult. A new Governor was dispatched and Musupel's gasses were processed by indentured slave workers and convicted criminals, who rapidly began showing signs of mutation.
Grund woke up on Serephene's ship. She told him about the fall of the revolution and the fate of the Governor. She claimed he had been knocked unconscious in the blast that killed the other mutant leaders and that she had dragged him to safety. Grund had no reason to doubt her. Serephene explained that Musupel had only been one small world in the vastness of the Imperium. Grun's revolution had failed, but there were more and greater revolutions to come. The Imperium had to reform or die and that she wanted him to be part of her great work.
Fiercely devoted to Serephene, who he regards as his saviour, Grund supports her with the zeal of an Apostle. He acts as her bodyguard and protector. Despite his unpleasant appearance, Grund is gregarious and friendly. He is also fiercely religious, with a deep faith in the Emperor, even though he believes that the Ecclesiarchy has lost its way and become corrupt. He has formed an unlikely friendship with the Tech Priest Martel Cranch and the two can spend hours trapped in debate about revolutionary politics and the best way to bring about the radical change they both feel the Imperium needs.
WS BS S T I Wp Sg Nv Ld
48 43 66 72 43 53 51 61 65
Right Handed
Equipment: Musket, with powder and shot for 20 shots, big knife (short sword)
Armour: None
Talents: Scales*, Mutated lungs**
* Grund is covered in bony scales which act as natural armour. He adds 1 to his base injury value (8).
** Being brought up in the highly noxious environment of Muspel, Grund's lungs are capable of processing most toxic gasses. He received +40% resistance to gas weapons.
I like the background, but the rules don't really match it. Someone who can be a leader for such a revolution, going against centuries of indoctrination, would probably have a higher leadership and perhaps the leader skill, he would be a very charismatic person. That would show him as a true revolutionary leader. Of course, non-mutants would be unlikely to listed due to their prejudice but he would still be capable of giving impressive speeches.
This is the last character. I have had the model and the concept sorted for a while, but it took me an age before I was happy with the way the background was written. I'm still not one hundred percent. The model will shortly be up in the painting and modelling section.
Keeva Shiv
Keeva Shiv was born in the ruins of Hive Octus on the planet Radolphus. The Hive had been destroyed during the Waagh of the Ork Warlord Bazagrag. The bulk of its population evacuated or killed, all the remained was the ruins of the Underhive and its gangs. Contrary to expectations, the gangers didn't simply die out, but managed to eke out a living scavenging from the wreckage and raiding wasteland settlements and the rare transports that ventured to that part of the planet. Over the centuries their primitive society became even more primitive, devolving into a tribal culture in which gangs became clans.
Keeva was the daughter of Arka Shiv, a Warlord of some repute who had managed to unite several clans under his banner and was on the way towards conquering the entire underhive. Keeva was brought up with an autopistol in each hand and became an accomplished gun slinger. Arka's success spawned powerful enemies. The Spike-Bone, Straken and Asgar clans formed and alliance against the Shiv. They invited Arka to a meeting of the clans, where the Shiv were ambushed and massacred. Only Keeva survived, fleeing into the ruins.
The young Keeva vowed vengeance against her father's and her clan's killers. Armed with her trusty auto-pistols she became a silent avenger, striking from the shadows and then disappearing. She successfully assassinated Krarl Straken and his entire family without being seen, marking each body with the sign of the Shiv clan. The clans came to believe that the Spirit of Arka himself had arisen to claim vengeance. But, when she made an attempt on the live of Gurren Asgar, she was scene. Now knowing that their enemy was flesh and blood and not supernatural, they clans began a ruthless hunt.
Keeva fled to the deepest part of the Underhive, but even there she would not have been able to stay hidden for long. Stopping for a drink at a one of the Underhive's small lakes, she came across a mysterious woman carrying a staff. Keeva readied her auto-pistols to defend herself, but before she could act her pursuers caught up with her. Keeva was astonished when the woman raised up her staff and the men fled in horror.
The woman, was Inquisitor Rayne Serephene. She had come to Radolphus hoping to learn something about this society that had survived in extreme conditions. She had considered that it might be worth radically reforming a few hive worlds by destroying the hive cities. But she had not been impressed by the superstitious primitives she had encountered and was intending to leave. Keeva's pursuers had been little more than an irritation.
However, Keeva's clan pride would not allow her to owe her life to this woman. She insisted that she accompany the Inquisitor until the debt was repaid. Serephene, impressed by the young woman's skill with an auto-pistol and her sheer nerve decided to take her up on the offer. She could always be abandoned later if she did not prove useful.
In fact, Keeva adapted fast to the wider Imperium. Brought up on primitive clan tales of an Empire beyond the stars, the worlds she encountered were no stranger than the stories she had been told. An excellent gun-slinger and fiercely loyal to Inquistor Serephene, she has more than proved her worth. She has formed something of a rivalry with Salazar Grummond, both of them seeing themselves as Serephene's bodyguard and anxious to demonstrate their superior skills. She is fascinated by Martel Cranch, the metal man as she calls him, less because of his outlandish appearance than because of his ability to repair her weapons. Serephene she regards as something between a legendary hero and a mythological monster, simultaneously afraid, fascinated and devoted to her.
WS BS S T I Wp Sg Nv Ld
47 69 53 51 71 54 57 74 48
Left-Handed
Equipment: Two Autopistols, Frag Grenade
Armour: Carapace (6) on Chest, Flak on all other locations except abdomen and head.
Talents: Fast Draw, Gunfighter
"seen" rather than "scene" :P
One thing about this girl sticks out -- in what you've told us, Serephene didn't see much of Shiv's gunslinging prowess beyond the fact that she was carrying two pistols, and yet that's a reason Shiv's been brought on board. Unless Serephene actually sees Shiv using those guns of hers, then Little Miss Underhive's basically being hired for her sheer chutzpar and nothing else, which says more about Serephene than it does about Shiv.
On a more minor note, autopistols are noisy, so her being a "silent" avenger seems a little strange. Perhaps "relentless" might work better if she manages to gun down a rival family (though again, her doing it without being noticed seems a little off given how loud her guns are likely to be... any chance you could expand on this part?)
She also doesn't seem to be carrying any spare ammunition, which is mildly off-putting...
Actually that's chutzpah ;)
I take your point on the auto-pistol noise, relentless probably does work better than silent.
One point that got lost in the multiple drafts was that Serephene had been watching the Underhive for some time and would have been well aware of the mysterious Shiv clan avenger and her one-woman crusade. I did make that point clearer in other drafts, but it just wasn't reading right. I said I still wasn't entirely happy with it.
The extra ammunition was just something I overlooked. I will iron that out when I get round to putting some character sheets together.
Quote from: Hum_Con on June 17, 2012, 08:58:54 PM
Actually that's chutzpah ;)
When you're transliterating a Yiddish word, I think anything goes. :P
QuoteI take your point on the auto-pistol noise, relentless probably does work better than silent.
Probably for the beDAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKA
QuoteOne point that got lost in the multiple drafts was that Serephene had been watching the Underhive for some time and would have been well aware of the mysterious Shiv clan avenger and her one-woman crusade. I did make that point clearer in other drafts, but it just wasn't reading right. I said I still wasn't entirely happy with it.
Well, this is why we're here -- so that you can take something and make it into something that you're happy with, that we're happy with, and that everyone's happy with. There's plenty of room to squeeze it in, so don't sweat it.
I would also put in the bit about the reputation, gunning down an entire family on her own would give her a huge reputation, and survival an even greater one.