Second Attempts.

[Darksinger]

Kaled, his first proper combat mission was after he met the other five. He landed on Charadon before he got any full tradng oppertunitys. Also, my warband is smaller than some of the ones in my campaign, and I wont be feilding all of them all of the time.

Also, I love the gun fingers idea. Made me laugh.

Finaly, Plenty of stories involve small bases on dead worlds, And do you really think Restin would hoarde all of his gold? He'd need to eat sometimes.

Next Character-

Molly Gestait
Molly is Right handed


WS   BS   S   T   I   Wp   Sg   Nv   Ld     
46   29   41   43   46   47   43   48   46   

Special Abilities
• Dodge

Equipment:
• Spear

• Laspistol- Civilian magazine, Stealth muzzle, Mid range Barrel, 16 megathule lasing chamber, Mars discharge generator, Standard grip, Standard frame,
• Cloth armour with leather boots, Gloves, Shoulderpads, Torsopads, Thighpads ect. (3 points of amour on all locations Exept head.)
---------------
Apearance
---------------
Still rather short, molly is only 4 foot 7. White, Brown shoulder length hair and peircing electric blue eyes. Her mud brown tanned leather armour is stiche on to her thick black cloth robes.

---------------
Background:
---------------
Molly was thrown out of her home at the age of Eight. Begging for food and shelter in the underhives of Archeron hive, Molly was taught one thing- those who give up, die. She was forced into work in the armnaments factorys under the brutal rule of the orks- a paticularily nasty Big Mek called Nark the Toothless 'took care' of the workers. She began to realise that her only chance of survival was to escape the hives, so began her plan. At mealtimes, she would whisper of her plans to the people she sat with, gaining support from them. Whilst she worked, She stole away parts to build herself a gun- the end result resembling something of a las-pistol.That night, she used this new weapon to laser the locks on her cell, freed the other prisoners and killed the sleeping Grots Nark had placed on door gaurd duty. Taking the orkish weapons, the prisoners fought thier way out, although the other prisoners had to use their weapons as clubs, due to a strange lack of function. After bidding farewell to her prisoner comrades, Molly stole away inside a Resuply Shuttle headed for the imperial world San Leor. However, the ship was redirected
Due to a small incursion of nurglings. An entire city was burned to the ground just in time to stop the spread, bwhich was the same city the ship was headed to. However, the supplys they needed to obtain were within reach on the Imperial planet Brimlock, where Molly escaped undetected. She encountered a trader called Restin, who was selling weapons so he could feed his small team. Molly begged him to take her with him, so that she could fight. He agreed on one condition- She had to prove herself in a duel with him. Molly accepted, picked up a spear from Restins stall and braced herself. Restin immediatly began to fight her, sword Verses spear. Molly desperatly dodged his attacks, Untill finally She saw her chance. As Restin stumbled over a loose cobblestone, Molly brought her spear up to restns back. Restin yeilded, and showed molly to his ship. On board, she met Amityius, who comlained about her havng cheated. Restin countered with the argument that 'if you stumbled in a fight, you think a chaos marine would wait untill you regained your balance?' Amityius and Molly then bagan a long contest over who would beat who, although Molly knew Amityius would win if it came down to it. Arriving on the dead world Doton, molly was enrolled into Restins team, and had her cobbled up firearm replaced with a customised las-pistol. Unbenowngst to her, Restin is secretly training her to succed him once he passes on.

[Adlan]

She built a Laspistol in an ork ruled factory? Orks don't generally use las weapons, so where did she get the parts?
She stowed away on an imperial bound ship? From an Ork held Planet? Was this in system? Even if it was I find it a stretch to believe. Why was the ship redirected? This could well restore my suspension of disbelief, was it due to contamination with ork spores, the hereasy of being on a xeno's held planet?
An expert swordsman was beaten by a slip of a girl? Spear is generally superior to Sword, but in this case, given that she seems to have had no prior experiance with the spear, I find it hard to believe. It'd have to be a spectacular slip to produce such a result. Was a Banana peel involved?
And then a spacemarine scout (with two bionic arms) and this young lady bicker about who would win?
The Background just seems to me unlikely thing X followed by unlikely thing X. And I know I'm being harsh here, for which I apologise, but I don't know how to tone it down in this instance.

I'm sorry, the character dosn't fit as hired muscle, isn't a sneak thief for the team, has no other skills. It feels like she's someones kid sister tagging along. Is she someone on the crews girlfriend/lover? I'm not opposed to having low power or weak characters, but the only roll I can see her fulfilling is that of a bullet catcher. Why is she part of the warband?

With a little more work on the background, a few more justifications and explanations, she'll be a fine character. And It's a major improvement over your first draft stuff, you've clearly put some effort in, well done .

[Kaled]

I'm still confused about his crew. You keep mentioning his small team, but an interstellar ship would have a crew of thousands. Or are you saying he's an extremely poor Rogue Trader with just a small interplanetary ship? Because it sounds like he has a warp-capable ship as you mention him travelling the stars, and it sounds like his family were rather wealthy (which makes sense if they're a dynasty of Rogue Traders).

On the same lines, the ship Molly stole away on would be a huge starship - not a small aircraft.

[Darksinger]

Kaled- He's not poor, he just dosent need a huge ship. Its big enough for warp capable transport and thats it really. His crew wait around at his base and train themselves with simulations whilst he makes plans, they pilot the ship and they wait whilst Restin does his trading, mabye they go for a drink or to visit a temple of some description. Not every ship in the universe has a Crew who are well renkowned. You can write a history for a squad of storm troopers famed for their use of vendetta gunships, but its highly unlikely you'd mention something bigger than the pilot of their Vendettas name.

Also, your right about the small aircraft thing. She would have stollen away on a warp capable ship of some proportions.

Adlan- I will edit the  background to fit these.

It resembled a las pistol. It wasn't A laspistol. And big meks use laser weaponry, as do may lootaz who simply cannot find enough bullets for their guns, or a gun barrl to give to the mek. When building a Kustom Mega Blasta, laser ammo can be essential.

Also, The supplys for the war can't all be made on Armaggedon. They woul'dnt have enough troops or guns produced i a year to fight the orks, especially under Gazghulls command. So it stands to reason that the other supplys must come from somewhere.
The ship was redirected Due to a small incursion of nurglings. An entire city was burned to the ground just in time to stop the spread, bwhich was the same city the ship was headed to. However, thesupplys they needed to obtain were within reach on the other planet.
There was no bannana peel, but a loose cobblestone, if stepped on one can send evn a grown man tumbling. My uncle actually broke his arm because he tripped on something similar.
The bicker was a joke between the two. It was sorta freindly in a way.
She's part of the warband because she
A)fought her way out of an ork ruled factory
B)Beat Restin in a duel and
C)Posseses a decent amount of knowledge into the working of Las weaponry. Restin aims to train hr as His succesor, to carry on the buisness should he die. (not too unreasonable is it?)

Finaly, Thank you for the Comment. Much apreciated.

Finally, Here is my next character.You'll know who he is when you read the background

Kastan Andersen.
Kastan is ambidextrous.


WS   BS   S   T   I   Wp   Sg   Nv   Ld      
89   23   76   63   34   58   53   67   64   

Special Abilities
• Fast Draw
• Feint

Equipment:
• Daemon weapon- Falchion. Powers are Bound, Breath, Is Wp 78
• Two knifes.
• 10 throwing knives
•A set of mesh armour, all locations exept head and torso. (4 points of armour). Torso is protected by a Duelling coat, made from thick leather and Kevlar.(5 points of armour.)
---------------
Apearance
---------------
Kastan is about 7 foot tall- he is a giant of a man. Heavily built muscles. Short shaggy grey hair, beard and moustache. Eyes are very dark brown, although he boasts that only his ex wife and his closest freinds have ever been close enough to see them properly. Wears his mesh armour proudly, and has a Crimson red long coat he wears over the top, secretly reinforced to protect his torso. Walks with a limp due to his crippled leg.

---------------
Background:
---------------
Kastan Andersen, up untill his second lengthy encounter with Restin Teljar, was a swrord trainer for hire. He would work with a employer until the trainee could beat him five times in a row, at which point he would collect 1000 imperial credits per month he had spent teaching them. Ever the gentleman, Kastan would always deduct 500 credits off of the charges in the month the trainees birthday was in. It was in this proffession that he first met the 14 year old Restin Taljar, Son of an rouge trader with a somewhat collosal hoarde of money. Kastan Trined with Restin thrice a week, untill the very day of Restins 17th birthday, at which point Restin actually broke Kestans Sword blade on his fifth round of combat. Kestin knew then he could teach him no more, and upon his departure, was presented with a very expensive sword, in addition to the other sum of money he was owed. Kastan spent the next three years on Restins homeworld, Vestroya, teachng the basics to paying clients and telling stories to the drunken city guard..Kastan went home, to the planet San Leor. He had only been home once in the past five years, at which point he had dispatched a squadron of mercenarys. He had stalked the leader of the unit to his meeting place, watched as they planned their next raid, then ambushed them the next day along with 10 of the city guards finest. However, two of the mercenarys got away, fleeing into the mountains. This time around, about a month into his home visit, the mercenarys ambushed him as he walked down a shortcut to his home. One mercenary knocked Kastan over whilst the other used a knock-up gas grenade to choke him. desperately trying not breath in, Kastan struck back at the mercenarys, but was clouded by the gasses and couldnt land a hit. Kastan felt like his own weapon was fighting him. Kastan concentrated, bringing up all his willpower, and struck again. This time, the weapon hit home, stabing the mercenary through the chest. The other one, sneaking up behind him, struck Kastan in the back, causing him to take a sharp intake of breath. To his surprise, Kastan could breath in the gasses now, without feeling lightheaded or woozy. In his breif moment of surprise, Kastan was disarmed, but felt as though part of him had just fallen off. Kastan jumped back, dodging the mercenarys next swing, then reached out for his sword. About a foot away from it, the handle quivered, then shot back into Kastans hand. The mercenary fell back in surprise, and Kastan stabbed him in the chest. Kastan looked at the sword he had been given by the Teljar family. Reaching out he toched the flat of the blade. In a breif moment of terror, Kastan saw a daemon, a single yellow eye on a melted green face, staring at him. Kastan knew he had come by a Daemon weapon. Kastan fled to the docks, vowng to get off planet before something bad happened, where he ran into Restin again. Restin was now much much older, but still (quite literally) welcomed Kestin with open arms. After recounting his tale, Restin invited Kastan to join him with his crew. Kastan Readil accepted, on the condition that, unless they were in a fight, the rest of the group waited up for him.

[O_o]

and I always thought M. Night Shyamalan movies where bad 

doo d stop and  re read  what  you have  wrote  and  see if  you can  plot holes  yourself

what you  write  shows me  you have a limited  scope of  the  background  for  either 40k  or  INQ
what I see is  you are writing  from what  you have  read or  heard  ppl  say  from codexs
try to  broaden your scope a bit  read a few black libray books (  NOT THE  HORUS HERESY  SET !! )

they  watching  a few action movies  (  for the story and  characters ) 
and  if  you really  need to  I will write you a LIST of  movies

[Kaled]

Kaled- He's not poor, he just dosent need a huge ship. Its big enough for warp capable transport and thats it really.

Maybe I'm not making myself clear - warp-capable ships don't come in any size other than huge. You talk about him looking for food to feed his small crew but the crew of a small warp-capable ship is still going to be numbered in the thousands - he'd be looking for enough food to feed a small town. The fluff you've written seems to treat the ship as something small (like the Millennium Falcon, Serenity, or even the Enterprise) and that just wouldn't be the case (more like something the size of a Star Destroyer). I'm not suggesting you need to write a whole background for them, but they have to exist - and in all likelihood they'd spend their entire life aboard ship - whole generations would live and die aboard ship. You can't just dismiss them, and given that they exist you might as well use a couple of them in your warband.

EDIT: I see you've changed the small aircraft to a resupply shuttle but you still need something bigger. A shuttle could be used to get her into orbit but you need a much bigger ship to get her to San Leor.
It might be worth you looking at some of the material on the FFG site for the Rogue Trader RPG, or maybe some of the Battlefleet Gothic stuff on the GW site.

[MarcoSkoll]

The fluff you've written seems to treat the ship as something small (like the Millennium Falcon, Serenity, or even the Enterprise) and that just wouldn't be the case (more like something the size of a Star Destroyer).

At a minimum, warp capable ships start at about a kilometre long and around a thousand crew.

There are rare exceptions - there are a mere handful of warp capable ships in the entire Imperium which are perhaps the size of a modest aircraft and need less than a dozen crew, but these require the VAST resources of both the Inquisition and the Mechanicus in tandem, and probably quite a bit of xeno or irreplicable ancient technology to work - and the emphasis there is on rare. No rogue trader would have such a ship.

Someone with the resources might have a largely servitor crewed ship, but servitors being mostly monotask means that you need even more of them than you would human crew (a human can perform a wider range of tasks than a servitor), and then quite a few crew just to maintain and program those servitors.

In 40k, things of the size of the Millennium Falcon (~25m long) or a Firefly (~60m long) would be limited to surface-to-orbit work, or perhaps interplanetary journeys.
But when I say that, bear in mind the difference between interplanetary and interstellar. The former is travelling between planets in the same solar system, the second is travelling between solar systems.

So, food for a warp capable ship is measured in truckloads (particularly as that food may have to last a year or more on longer voyages) not shopping carts.

[Kaled]

•A set of mesh armour, all locations exept head and torso. (4 points of armour). Torso is protected by extra padding in the form of his coat, so ahs % points of armour.

It's not made clear in the rulebook, but armour doesn't stack - you just use the AV of the heaviest armour a character has on a location. So a heavy coat over mesh armour is AV4, not 6. There are exceptions, such as armour built into a bionic.

It's usual for anyone who comes into contact with daemons to be executed, even marines are often mind-wiped, such are the measures necessary to prevent the taint of chaos spreading. But he encountered the daemonic first hand, defeated a thing of nightmares, was caught in it's death throes, and had it bound into his blade, and all that happened to him was he got a bit of a limp. By rights he should have been driven insane by his experiences, then executed by the Grey Knights. There's certainly no way he'd be allowed to wander off with a daemon sword - that's the sort of thing even Inquisitors get executed for owning.

I'm sorry, but his story is just not believable - I think you need to rewrite pretty much everything after him training your Rogue Trader*. I assume the core concept for this guy is a swordmaster carrying a daemonsword. The best way I can think to achieve that is for him not to know what the sword is. I'd suggest that Restin's family unknowingly gave him a daemonsword they'd obtained in some trade - he's in some way attuned to the daemon and it's bound itself to him and is driving him insane as he falls victim to it's will. In fact, looking at their Wp's he's already under the control of the daemon.

* Unless he is actually a makeup salesman, it's Rogue Trader not rouge trader.

[Darksinger]

0_o - yea im pretty new and dont extensively read fluff. Didn't you guess? I called my first thread 'brand new character, brand new player'.
I'm also quite budget short. what i do have goes into my armys, not the book series.

kaled- I'll change that. And ok, youve convinced me, I'll write up a few chracters from his crew as warband members.
Thanks for letting me know about armour stacking. would a mail armour set with a built in longcoat be legal, or will i really have to change that arour value?
I do see your point about executions. Will re-write background tomorrow (i'm getting tired)
Have i really been writing rouge trader? I mean Rogue trader of course, but my spelling is attrocious. sorry.

Marcoskoll- I will really need to Alter his ship. Any good ideas for a name? Most ship have names, so i need a good one. my ideas include-

Pride of the Teljars
Dutyforged
Solarbound
Warpspectre

[JoelMcKickass]

Warpspectre sounds pretty cool, but Pride of the Teljar's would most likely be the name you should go for. For his chest, you could make your own armour which is AV 5, something like duelist's cuirass, or something.

[MarcoSkoll]

yea im pretty new and dont extensively read fluff. Didn't you guess? I called my first thread 'brand new character, brand new player'.

Inquisitor is as fluff heavy as GW games get (theoretically excepting the actual RPGs), but it's surprising just how much you can pick up from hanging around the Conclave. I joined about two years ago, and I've gone from a passable knowledge to a much more impressive one.

Have i really been writing rouge trader? I mean Rogue trader of course

I come close to writing it at times. The keyboard layout makes it rather easy for the right finger to find the U before the left finds the G, and put them in the wrong order.

Any good ideas for a name? Most ship have names, so I need a good one.

I have to disagree with Joel, and say I would avoid "Warpspectre". While the word Warp is commonly used from our perspective, it's thought of as a bit jinxed in the 40k universe, so most characters will treat it a bit like "The Scottish play" and call it things like the Æthyr (because ligatures and Y as a vowel make it more mysterious!), Immaterium or any number of euphemisms.

So, I'd say "Pride of the Teljars" is the best of those.

One thing I'd say is that if you do try coming up with more ideas, a civilian ship should probably avoid using military terms or names of weapons in its name.

[Darksinger]

Ok, re wrote background. Let me now what ypou think.

Have also re-written Kastans Background. Also mentioned Restins ship in his background, by name. (Pride of the Teljars)

next post will contain the last two characters Restin recruits from off his ship, then i will get started on his Crew members (im gonna do 3, so that i have a nine strong warband i can choose from.) Would apreciate ideas for the crew warbanders, such as names and what positions they would fufill when working on bard the ship.

[Kaled]

For ships crew, you'd have various officers to run the ship, armsmen to keep the crew in line (and maybe act as guards when your Rogue Trader leaves his ship), you'd have some Enginseers to run the engine room, and a whole load of lowly crewmen to do the physical labour. The Mechanicum often send an explorator to accompany Rogue Traders to investigate any technology they find. Also, the ship would have preachers to tend to the crews spiritual well-being, and likely some strange cults have grown up in the bowels of the ship - there's also likely to be a missionary or two on board to convert the population of any new worlds they discover. The ship would have a Navigator and Astropath.

Plenty of options - in fact, as a ship is a small city in itself you could find a way to fit almost any archetype into the mix. So for example, Molly could have been born in the bowels of the ship, and her escape could have been from the armsmen and overseers rather than orks, eventually making her way to the officers quarters where she encountered Restin and they fought their duel and she gained his respect... That's just an example, I'm not saying you should do that, just showing how the fact that someone is from the ship doesn't mean they need to be a serving officer or crewman.

[Darksinger]

Kaled- thanks for that (although im gonna leave molly as she is).

I think that, for the crew characters, the best ones to do wold be-

An engineer
An Armsman
The Navigator.

Also, Here are my next two characters (separated by two lines for your convinience)

Jorge Alexander Makairus. 'Jammy' to his freinds.
Jorge is right handed


WS   BS   S   T   I   Wp   Sg   Nv   Ld     
51   54   62   58   52   61   41   91   53   

Special Abilities
• Quickload
• Rock-steady aim.
Equipment:
• Las pistol- Hotshot magazine, Standard muzzle, mid ranged barrel, 18 megathule lasing chamber, Mars discharge generator, Standard trigger/grip, standard frame.
• 3 fragmentation grenades.
• 2 krak grenades.
• Flak armour on chest, abdomen, groin and legs. (4 points of armour)
• Metal bracers on his forearms (gives arms 1 point of armour)
---------------
Apearance
---------------
Musclebound. 6 foot 4. Flack armour on torso is covered by a mud coloured leather vest (no effect on armor) with rag-tag rends where the sleeves used to be. Brown eyes. Short cut Mohawk. (brown hair)
---------------
Background:
---------------
Jorge was born into the resistance. On his homeworld, the name of which has long since been forgotten, Jorge was fighting for his life since the day he was born. 'homeworld' as Jorge learned to call it, was ruled over by a vast chaos cult, dedicated to the blood god khorne. Only a small amount of the poulation was resisting inside the supposedly inpenatrable city walls. Jorge grew up learning how to fire guns, throw grenades and make the most use of cover whilst he reloaded. He practiced and practiced, going over drills for in case of Cultist attacks. At the age of 6, Jorge had built his first Laspistol. He advanced through the livefire classes and survived raid after raid. By his fiftenth birthday, Jorge had killed 5 chaos space marines and over 50 cultists with the use of grenades. However, oneday, the Adeptus Astartes finally arrived, and after 3 months seige, broke through the city walls with several thunderfire cannons. Sweeping throug th city, the space marines found and destroyed the Cultist base, Eradicating all things chaos tainted in their path. Jorge was taken to the planet NAME where he was given a home and job in the munitions factorys. However, Jorge had grown up knowing fighting, not civil grace. He got into figts, broke things without reason and shouted insults at anyone who came knocking. 10 years of fighting, arguments and vandalism later and Jorge encountered Restin Teljar, a trader with something Jorge could finally talk about- weapons. They talked for hours about the adventures they had had, different laspistols, and Jorge even demonstrated the sort he built back during the days of the resistance. Resin invited Jorge to come along with him, as long as he kept his temper in check. Accepting this deal, Jorge and Restin returned to Restins ship, 'Pride of the Teljars', upon which Jorge met Kastan, a giant of a man, Molly and Naga, a pair of younger recruits and lastly Amityius, a space marine scout under oath of service.  

==============================================================================

Naga Grinlock
Naga is right handed.


WS   BS   S   T   I   Wp   Sg   Nv   Ld     
34   43   39   41   41   83   75   57   58   

Special Abilities
• Psychic powers- Regenerate, Warp Strength.

Equipment:
• Lasgun- Military Magazine, Mid- range barrel, Standard Muzzle, 21 megathule lasing chamber, triphex-phall discharge generator, standard Frame, no stock.
•Flak Armour on all locations. (including head)
---------------
Apearance
---------------
Four foot four. blonde unkempt hair. black eyes, thin and gangly. looking, but stronger than he looks.

---------------
Background:
---------------
Naga has been on the run almost all his life. Since he was ten years old, Naga showed signs of psychic activity. Born on the planet Talasa prime, Naga was introduced to the imperial chapel as a brother, along with his siter Sophia after eight years of attendance. Two years later, there was an accident involving a candlestick and Sophia- her hair set alight and badly burned her. Naga, who was desraught at his sisters state, wished her well again with all his heart. In his mind, something clicked, and Sophias hair began to regrow, slowly but surely, and her burns began to fade. Shortly, Sophias body was in a near normal state. However, the chapel leader caught Naga, and sentanced him to death for witchcraft. Naga lashed out in fury, knocking over the high priest. Naga grabbed his sisters hand and ran for his life. As they fled the chapel, a city guardsman shot Sophia- her life extinguished instantly. Naga clenched his fists, his minded bcame clouded with rage and he punched the cityguard in the face. Psychic power went into that punch, knocking the soldier out where he stood. Picking up the unconcious troopers lasgun, Naga ran for his life down the crowded streets of the city. For years, Naga evaded the City Guard, hiding in cewers, living on peoples rooftops and begging food from the odd civilian. After 12 years of unsuccessful attempts to catch him, The city guard called in an Inquisitor. This inquisitor was a veteran from many campaigns, and Naga knew the time had come to escape the planet. That day, a trader named Restin came to town, acompanied by a young girl and a rather grizly giant. Restin was explaining to the girl how a bolt-pistol works, whilst the giant was watching for trouble. Naga slowly advanced up to them, and introduced himself. Restin took ahold of Nagas lasgun, looked at it, questioned him on how he got it, then let it go. The giant, now revealed as Kastan Andersen, Shook Nagas hand loosely, whilst Naga stood in awe of Kastan. Molly, as the girl was named, asked Restin whether or not they should take him with them. Naga begged them to do so, promising he would help them. He begged until Restin agreed, and Molly  said that she would take him back to the ship whilst 'you two big lads pack up shop.' Molly took Naga's hand and led him back to the ship. An hour later, Restin returned, grabbed Nagas shirt collar and began to question him abou why an inquisitor was after him. After some explanation, a vote was cast. A space marine named Amityius and Restin voted against keeping Naga, whilst Molly and Kastan voted to keep him. Eventually, the vote was settled the easy way- Kastan flipped a coin and called it. If it was heads, Naga was to stay, if tails, he was to be handed over to the inquisitor. The result was heads. Naga was given his own armour. He was in the team.  

[Kaled]

A fifteen year old boy killing five Astartes seems unlikely - even using grenades, to actually kill a marine is difficult, they're rather resilient.  And I dread to think what chaos marines would do in retaliation for one of their number being killed by the resistance...

I also don't believe a psychic ten year old boy could survive twelve years on his own on the run. For a start, rogue psykers are a danger to themselves and others - they're liable to attract daemons and all manner of other warp entities, or just kill themselves as their powers get out of control.  Also, the authorities on each planet are pretty good at tracking down psykers - they have to be be in order to meet their tithe for the Blackships and to avoid the Witch-seekers accusing them of failing to control their psychic population.  Also, it would be an extremely brave, or foolhardy, Guard Captain who would admit to an Inquisitor that he is unable to do his job - he's likely to just be executed for incompetence.  A better story would be to make him slightly older when his powers manifest, then have him stow-away on the Rogue Trader's ship as soon as he hears the Blackships have arrived.  Although quite why Restin and his crew would risk their lives (and souls) by taking a dangerous untrained psyker aboard their ship I don't know...

I think you still need to work on the swordmaster some more - his Wp is much lower than that of the daemon so it would be able to control him much of the time.  It might be clever enough to do so in a way that Restin and the others don't know about - but it would have a plan to escape and would be using Kastan to bring it to fruition.  Maybe Kastan has blackouts and wakes up in an alley way or corridor in the bowels of the ship covered in blood surrounded by dismembered corpses.  Carrying a daemon weapon that you can't control and can't get rid of should be a terrifying nightmarish experience - you need to bring more of that to Kastan's background.

Also, why is Restin grooming Molly to be his successor - why is he not planning to pass the licence on to a biological heir?