Author Topic: Inquisitor Maximilian Shannow..comments/critiques (like I had to say:P)  (Read 1356 times)

Offline Shannow

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After working through some issues on the 'winged inquisitor character' thread, This is the full Stats, equipment and backstory I've come up with. The full backstory thus far is a bit long, so I condensed all the justification bits for those that don't like to read my poorly written stuff.

Just so you know this is the model I'll be using and I'm planning on 1. Enlarging the sword and placing it in a scabbard between his wings 2. Giving him a hefty pistol in that right hand 3. Adding a scary mask (subject to seeing how it works) 4. Using some modelling chain in his left hand with a small -][- symbol on it 5. Add extra armour to abdomen legs and arms.

Inquisitor Maximilian Shannow:

Ws=77 Bs=61 S=60 T=69 I=70 Wp=79 Sg=68 Nv=75 Ld=71 S=5

Basic Story which Explains Characteristics and Equipment.

Ws – Very good swordsman a natural talent and much practice and experience, Vivaldus the daemon in his sword grants it an un-natural lightness and maneuverability for its size, treat as normal sword size and weight but with falchion damage and parry penalty.

Bs – Good enough shot, but only with single shot pistol types, any other gun -10

S – good strength, very physically fit as Ws reasons.

T – enhanced by the interaction with the Ataxia Telangiectasium

I – on the ball from years of service

Wp – a practiced and potentially more gifted psyker though possibly tainted from early chaos presence (see full back story)

Sg – very learned, but not higher as this is specific to certain areas more so than other perhaps Gm could reflect this in particular circumstances with +modifier

Nv – faced the horrors of the warp and feels certain he has come out stronger

Ld – picks his men well as they share like minds of perhaps unscrupulous means and they follow him well
Weapons: Vivaldus - Daemon sword, low magnum revolver + 2 reloads
Equipment: Carapace legs, arms, abdomen and mask will be a value of 3 if used. Displacement field, 2 X stasis grenades

Skills – Telepathy his choice of power as it allows tracking of individual and co-ordination of followers in accordance with their position. First strike achieved through much blade practice in the field coupled with its daemonic abilities allows swift action.

Armour as per model and conversion, Displacement shield as lacks some in vital areas, and has swift wing speed to make quick changes to plan.

Wings - Using alien generator movement rules (can lift human with heavy bones through daemonic spawned powers) and if a shot misses Shannow by less than 20% they can roll again with a 25% chance they will hit his wings (unless the to hit chance is less than 20% originally, in which case the miss score has to be within that amount i.e. less then 10% miss is the to hit chance was 10%) this rule idea courtesy of Marcoskoll - much obliged ;D

Reason for wings is found in the 5th paragraph below:

Inquisitor Maximilian Shannow: Shannow was born and raised on the planet Nocturna-Solaris, so called as due to its lack of axial spin, one half of the planet was permanently in darkness and the other in light. This leading to a population of extreme opposites, half dark skinned with small almost entirely white eyes and the other pale skinned with large obsidian pupil dominated eyes to accommodate for the general lack of light, not even compensated for by the aged globe spheres used to light there homes. Shannow was born to the latter population though at an extreme paleness even for them with almost translucent skin. This too was mirrored in his hair though in years to come he would dye it black to enhance the contrast with his skin, which along with other acquired traits would prove useful in present a more terrifying visage.

   His discovery by Inquisitor Erebus of the Ordo Malleus was precipitated by a psychic scream that the Astropath aboard Erebus’ ship picked whilst in close proximity to his home world and which was accompanied with a profound pain so said the Astropath. On the surface of Nocturna-Solaris they found the pale skinned teenager weeping in a village, surrounded by the bodies of the townsfolk who had been killed by the uncontrolled blast of power, a small number of these however clearly possessed the mark of daemon worship; either in the form of a hidden brand or gruesome ‘gift’ of chaos. After much questioning, little answering and examination for taint, Erebus concluded the child had in all possibility reacted to a daemon worshipper revealing themselves in an attempt to kidnap the young Shannow with his powers and thus declared him clean and recruited into his service, and therefore that of the Emperor.

   The psychic talents of Shannow were well tutored by the hand of Erebus’ staff; though lacking the strength of power that he had clearly been capable on Nocturna-Solaris he was nevertheless an extremely competent psyker. Aside from these his rigours included much training for the combat that would come when his master declared him old enough and well enough for the rank of Interrogator. He proved an exceptional swordsman and a more than able marksman though his greatest competency certainly lay with small pistol firearms and was less keen on the bulky rifles he practiced with.

   At the age of 57 with over 4 decades of gathering knowledge, skills and scars, he attained the rank of Inquisitor with much support and enthusiasm of Erebus, who gifted him an exquisite revolver from his own personal collection that he knew Shannow (or Maximilian as he now regarded him) had much coveted. With swift progression Inquisitor Shannow rose in the esteem of the Holy Inquisition, purging many cults and twisted devils. However as his activity became more secretive many began to suspect that he was devoting perhaps too much time to the study of the forces his enemy employed and becoming less interested in their unfaltering destruction. They were, to the sadness of many to prove right in their whisperings.

   Shannow had secretly acquired the Ataxia Telangiectasium; a relic of the Horus Heresy that was rumoured to contain such vast power that allowed the possessor to change shape as and when he wished. In his arrogance, Shannow believed himself capable of controlling this twisted daemonic creation. In his first use of the relic he felt the power flowing through his veins and he unleashed it with wanton glee. Great shadows of smoke unfurled behind him dissipating to reveal 30ft wings of the deepest black. His joy was short lived. Re-focusing his mind, he once again sought that eldritch warp energy he had so briefly tasted, only to find it cut of and the echo of manic giggling reverberating in his head. He had been tricked, fooled and felt ashamed. This too however was short lived as he felt the great surge of power that remained in his wings; the day had not been fruitless after all.

   Only the desperate words of his distraught ex-mentor Erebus saved him for being declared a heretic, but this was to all but the most radical inquisitors semantics and few now associated with Shannow; many hunted him. Now in his 145th year he has done little to dissuade their conceptions having bound daemons both to metal and flesh. The greatest of which being Vivaldus, the being that now occupies his daemon blade bestowing it with an unnatural lightness, as though it is nearly the height of Shannow himself he wields it with such grace and finesse easily destroying the evil he seeks.
   Standing on the edge, Inquisitor Maximilian Shannow is terribly close to a pit of despair. Many believe he may already have entered it.

Sorry how long this post is, I hope some of you make it through. And that i haven't made a complete hash of my first attempt :o


EDIT: Having being musing things over I have cancelled the order for the miniature I was going to use, as though I am happy with the background and stats etc, I am finding my own ability to suspend belief over the wings failing, and so I will leave it a few weeks and see how my mind sits before modelling. I may do away with the wings and add some other level of chaotic influence to him instead.
« Last Edit: May 28, 2010, 02:16:53 PM by Shannow »
I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tanhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.

Time to die.

Offline Myriad

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looks good enough to me  :)
I had better point out, that some of the clubs I represent are of a military bent.

You know what you are?  A plywood shark!

Offline JoelMcKickass

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Just out of curiosity, which powers does the Daemon sword have? I'm guessing Deflection from the description, but may i also suggest Daemonbane, if he truly believes he's using Chaos for good and is in control of it, i can see the Daemon bound to his blade reflecting that, and reinforcing his view that he's doing the Emperor's work.

Also, add a comm's unit to his mask and all of his men, otherwise he might not be able to co-ordinate them too well :P

Offline Shannow

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The daemon power I gave him was a made up one that I haven't named but bestows a lightness upon the blade (as the sword will be huge) that allows it to be wielded one handed.

'Vivaldus the daemon in his sword grants it an un-natural lightness and manoeuvrability for its size, treat as normal sword size and weight but with falchion damage and parry penalty'

I'm not sure whether that ok or not?

And in terms of contacting his squad members I was planning on using telepathy, but may add a communicator later.

Thanks for the replies so far:)
I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tanhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.

Time to die.